Friday, January 15, 2016
I am going to keep some details out because this is a deeply personal story. But, as your mama, I need to tell you some things that I am learning in this journey. I need to write it now so that I don't forget. I need to share this with others because the truths that God is teaching me can encourage others in the same or similar situations. The older I get the more I realize that I do not understand. In that state of grasping for truth and understanding, I have to simply trust. Searching for understanding is a good thing, but trust is needed every step of the way. And, in searching for understanding, I have to realize that the most important things to understand are eternal. This world, and the brokenness in it, are temporary, and therefore not very important in the grand scheme of things.
Thursday, August 14, 2014
This focus that you have to keep trying until you master it is amazing and something I can learn from. God wants us to look at problems as opportunities. He wants to work through us. We don't have to depend on our own strength to master something. He is right there with the resources that we need to accomplish it. I pray that the determination you have right now will grow and mature into a dependence on your Creator. I pray that you will learn where your strength comes from and who gave you that amazing personality to keep going and not give up. It is so much fun to watch you learn. I look forward to the many times you will master a new skill. And I thank God for the determination that you have to go after it.
Philippians 4:13 I can do all things through Him who strengthens me.
Saturday, May 31, 2014
Especially with years of experience teaching two-year-olds, I have heard the phrase "terrible two's" a lot. When you were born, I started a two year break from teaching two-year-olds. I am ready for this year. I am excited about this year. You are learning so much! You are experiencing the fussiness and whining of discovering that you want your own way. But what an opportunity it is to teach you! As you discover your own will, you are learning that God wants you to think about others. You are learning that sometimes you have to wait. And you are learning to take turns and be patient. So many discoveries and so much wonder and excitement! Each thing you learn adds to who you are. The joy that God placed within you is growing. Oh how I pray that never stops! God can use you in so many ways to spread joy and His love to those around you. You take such pleasure in simple things. We love spending time with you. And you have so many people that love you. So as we jump into this year of you being two, I say it is "terrific two's." It's a terrific time of learning, discovery, and lots of laughter. No terrible two's here. Opportunity? Yes. Growth? Yes. Tantrums? Sometimes. But we move on. We learn. We are in training. The funny thing is that sometimes those tantrums teach Mama that something needs to change in my heart too. It's that way for all of life. God is shaping and molding us throughout life circumstances, and there is always more to learn. I once heard a preacher say that every home needs a two-year-old for entertainment, and now I know why. Jedidiah, you are so much fun! And we love you so much!
Tuesday, January 14, 2014
Is not this the fast that I have chosen? to loose the bands of wickedness, to undo the heavy burdens, and to let the oppressed go free, and that ye break every yoke? Is it not to deal thy bread to the hungry, and that thou bring the poor that are cast out to thy house? when thou seest the naked, that thou cover him; and that thou hide not thyself from thine own flesh? Then shall they light break forth as the morning, and thine health shall sprin forth speedily: and they righteousness shall go before thee; the glory of the LORD shall be thy rereward.
Wednesday, October 30, 2013
So today was the first time that I heard you labeled by somebody as "disabled." As I think about it, it is actually quite nice that it hasn't happened sooner. We have been extremely blessed with a pediatrician and therapists and eye doctors that are all very encouraging and see your determination. So many have spoken over you words of life and encouragement. Your lack of perfect vision does not stop you. I see a very determined spirit in you that works at something over and over until you feel that it is mastered. Others see it too. At times it is often hilarious, as you go for the stairs again so that you can step up and down them or plop down on the floor so you can pull yourself up for the 100th time. So as a mother, my stomach immediately felt sick upon hearing you labeled like that. My first instinct was to try to say something to the adult that said it, but I quickly thought about the intentions of the individual. I let it go. The experience got me thinking.
Disablity is actually the best place that you can be. God wants to bring you to the point of realizing your weakness, your inability, your lack of resources, your sinful nature so that He can have the opportunity to save you and to bring glory to Himself. If we are always able to handle it, then we won't ask Him for help. If we have a defecit in strength, ability, stamina, patience, or anything else then we know our need for someone stronger. We only look for help once we realize our need. That is why the law is so important, and an understanding of the law and judgement can be used by God to bring somebody to salvation. We cannot do it on our own. We can never measure up. The moment that we think we are good enough is a very dangerous moment that leads to destruction. Our desire to be in control and to please God on our own will never get us there.
What a loving God to use the law to show us our need for Him! I think about this role of parenting as we have gradually moved into a stage involving a lot more training and discipline. A parent wants their child to make the right choice. There is such a desire to see your child succeed in what you are teaching them. You do not want to bring that consequence for a wrong choice. God, in His love for us, uses the law as a tool to help us choose life. It points us to our Savior.
So yes, the first time you were "labeled" by a well meaning individual may have stirred up some mother bear responses deep down inside, but I know that disability is exactly where we all need to be. God can receive glory from our own disability, no matter what area it is in. And that is the greatest purpose of life. To glorify God. And no matter who labels you as "disabled," whether their intentions be good or evil, I hope and pray that God will lead you to the point where you come face to face with your own spiritual disability and cry out to Him to fill you with His ability and use you for His glory.
Friday, January 25, 2013
God as El-Shaddai
As you grow, you will learn and meditate on different aspects of God's character. This word El-Shaddai means that God is all sufficient. When other sources run dry, God is abundant. When everything else fails, God is able. The last few months of your life have proven this time and time again. You have had numerous medical issues and seen many medical specialists. All of the doctors kept saying something was definitely wrong, but they couldn't give us an answer as to what. Every natural means of helping you was exhausted. We needed to put you on a feeding tube because you were not taking in the nourishment that you needed on your own. As Mama and Papa kept praying and trying new things to help you, nothing seemed to help enough. Certain things would help at times, but nothing got you to where you needed to be in order to thrive and get off of the feeding tube. We cried out to God and prayed for your healing. Each feeding time was a chance for Mama to trust God and not any certain special formula, comfortable position, way of rocking you, medicine, or any other means of helping you. Many times it would seem as if you were not going to drink anything, but God would intervene and the bottle would be empty by the end of the feeding. God showcases His glory when we turn to him. His strength is sufficient in our weakness! There was nothing natural that could help you enough, but God is faithful. He is more powerful than any sort of medicine. We can rest and trust in God, even when our natural eyes see no signs of hope. God gets all of the glory even for something as basic but essential as an empty bottle. This detail of your life is not out of God's view. He knows every detail, and your life is in the palm of His very capable hand.
2 Corinthians 12:9
And he said unto me, "My grace is sufficient for thee: for my strength is made perfect in weakness." Most gladly therefore will I rather glory in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me.
Tuesday, November 6, 2012
2Co 4:16-18 For which cause we faint not; but though our outward man perish, yet the inward man is renewed day by day. For our light affliction, which is but for a moment, worketh for us a far more exceeding and eternal weight of glory; while we look not at the things which are seen, but at the things which are not seen: for the things which are seen are temporal; but the things which are not seen are eternal.